Yesterday I resolved the HP issue, at least temporarily. I'm not going to go into all the details, but I will say that HP's technical support staff apparently don't know when their own case managers are working, and apparently will give out conflicting information. I was told that they weren't there, and ended up having to go a round about way to speak with them because they were there. If you ever find yourself in a similar situation, call (650) 857-1501 (HP's corporate number), ask to speak with an executive relations manager, explain the situation to him or her, and ask them to put you in touch with a case manager. Things will go a lot more smoothly from that point.
In any event, it looks like the class action lawsuit is indeed legitimate, and you should probably go through the process of completing the claim form rather than contacting HP directly. It'll probably leave you with a much smaller headache. Any way, thank you James for your help!
On another subject, I've finally made my writing competition site, WriFi, available. It's still in beta form, but at least it will be able to give everyone an idea of what I envision. I'm accepting the first 250 people that sign up on the site as beta testers, and will work with them to improve the site. Please forgive the lack of uber fanciness, it's the functionality that counts.